The Pawpaw: Gorton says, “I am the Council,” executes Order 66

Lexington, Ky. (SATIRE)–Lexington Mayor Linda Gorton permanently circumvented the incoming Urban County Council Thursday, directing her Police Chief, Lawrence Weathers, to execute the rarely used and controversial Order 66.

“I was so encouraged by the progress my lame duck Council made Tuesday night by passing my license plate readers early, that I figured, why not take it a step further?” Gorton said chirpily.

“I AM the Council.”

The incoming Council members could not be reached for comment, as of press time.